Our Existence

Comparison with stars - Solid Bodies
One name represents one body.
its not the collection of Bodies like Galaxies or Quasars.
Each Galaxy can contain millions of ANTARES'.
It can't be calculated with help of any SCALE.
Its just a view of one smallest part of our GALAXY...

First scale
(Five Smallest Heavenly Bodies of Our solar system) - Pluto is no longer Planet yet







Second Scale
(All Planets of our Solar System)




Third Scale

(Complete Solar System with our Parent Star SUN )





Fourth Scale

(Visibly Stars Like Arcturus & Sirius)





Fifth Scale

(Biggest Stars which can be seen through Naked Eyes - Antares & Betelgeuse)



Some Interesting GIFs

Contra vs Tetris


Contra vs Tetris





Frogs


Frogs





Programmer


Programmer





Frustrated Programmer


Frustrated Programmer



Kabootar


Kabootar



Cat vs Dog


Cat vs Dog



Fishing


Fishing





Crush


Crush



Runner


Runner



Catch it

Catch it





Arrrrrr

Arrrrrr



Jump

Jump





Loop

Loop


WoW


WoW


Birds

Birds





Dont dig for others

Dont dig for others

HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB?




Put about 100 bricks in some
Particular order in a closed
Room with an
Open window.









Then send 2 or 3 candidates in
The room and close the door.










Leave them alone and come back
After 6 hours and then analyze
The situation.










If they are counting the
Bricks.
Put them in the accounts
Department.










If they are recounting them..
Put them in auditing.












If they have messed up the
Whole place with the bricks.
Put them in engineering.













If they are arranging the
Bricks in some strange order.
Put them in planning.










If they are throwing the
Bricks at each other.
Put them in operations .












If they are sleeping.
Put them in security.












If they have broken the bricks
Into pieces.
Put them in information
Technology.











If they are sitting idle.
Put them in human resources.










If they say they have tried
Different combinations, yet
Not a brick has
Been moved. Put them in sales.












If they have already left for
The day.
Put them in marketing.











If they are staring out of the
Window.
Put them on strategic
Planning.










And then last but not least.
If they are talking to each
Other and not a single brick
Has been
Moved










Congratulate them and put them
In top management.




Impressive



Self Appraisal

A little boy went to a telephone booth which was at the cash counter of a store and dialed a number. The store-owner observed and listened to the conversation:

Boy : "Lady, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?

Woman : (at the other end of the phone line) "I already have someone to cut my lawn."

Boy : "Lady, I will cut your lawn for half the price than the person who cuts your lawn now."

Woman : I'm very satisfied with the person who is presently cutting my lawn.

Boy : (with more perseverance) "Lady, I'll even sweep the floor and the stairs of your house for free.

Woman : No, thank you. With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.


The store-owner, who was listening to all this, walked over to the boy.

Store Owner : "Son... I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit and would like to offer you a job."

Boy : "No thanks"

Store Owner : But you were really pleading for one.

Boy : No Sir, I was just checking my performance at the job I already have. I am the one who is working for that lady I was talking to!"


Excellence



A German once visited a temple under construction where he saw a sculptor making an idol of God. Suddenly he noticed a similar idol lying nearby. Surprised, he asked the sculptor, "Do you need two statues of the same idol?" "No," said the sculptor without looking up, "We need only one, but the first one got damaged at the last stage." The gentleman examined the idol and found no apparent damage. "Where is the damage?" he asked. "There is a scratch on the nose of the idol." said the sculptor, still busy with his work. "Where are you going to install the idol?"

The sculptor replied that it would be installed on a pillar twenty feet high. "If the idol is that far, who is going to know that there is a scratch on the nose?" the gentleman asked. The sculptor stopped his work, looked up at the gentleman, smiled and said, "I will know it."



What do you have?



PROJECT Manager working in an MNC, as usual after lunch goes to the cafeteria for coffee

He relaxes in canteen. He sees a canteen boy cleaning tables there.

To Kill time he decides to have fun with him..

He calls him.

PROJECT Manager - (Asks canteen boy) : How much do you earn?

Canteen boy smiles

PROJECT Manager - what are your future plans?

Canteen boy keeps quiet...

PROJECT Manager - where do you see yourself 10 years down the line?

Canteen boy gives a cold stare.

PROJECT Manager - Jab mai Bombay aaya tha tab mere paas bhi kuch nahi tha.

Aaj mere paas

Naam hai.

Shohrat hai.

Paisa hai............

Izzat Hai..............,

Tumhare paas kya hai?

Canteen boy - Saab mere paas bahut KAAM hai !!!




View



A man saw a small & poor boy looking at his expensive car.

Boy said - How much does it cost?

Man : I don't know, My brother has gifted to me.

Boy : So nice of him.

Man : I know what r u thinking, You also want to have a Brother like him.

Boy : No, I want to be a BROTHER like him.




Make a Difference




A man was walking down the beach at sunset. As, he walked along, he saw another man in the distance. He noticed this man kept leaning down, picking up something and throwing it out into the water, again and again. As, he approached even closer, he noticed that the man was picking up starfish that had been washed up on the beach. He was throwing them back into the water, one by one.

Puzzled, he approached the man and said, "Good Evening. I was wondering what you are doing."

"I'm throwing these starfish back into the ocean. You see, it's low tide and all these starfish have been washed up onto the shore. If, I don't throw them back into the ocean, they'll die up here from lack of oxygen."

"But, there must be thousands of starfish on this beach. You can't possible get to all of them. And, don't you realize this is probably happening on hundreds of beaches all up and down this coast. Can't you see that you can't possibly make a difference?"

The man bent down and picked up yet another starfish, and threw it back into the ocean. With a smile he replied, "Made a difference to that one !!!"


Hat-seller and Monkeys


A hat-seller who was passing by a forest decided to take a nap under one of the trees, so he left his whole basket of hats by the side

A few hours later, he woke up and realized that all his hats were gone.

He looked up and to his surprise, the tree was full of monkeys and they had taken all his hats. He sits down and thinks of how he can get the hats down.

While thinking he started to scratch his head.
The next moment, the monkeys were doing the same. Next, he took down his own hat,

the monkeys did exactly the same. An idea came to him, he took his hat and threw it on the floor and the monkeys did that too. So he finally managed to get all his hats back.

Fifty years later, his grandson, Pappu, also became a hat-seller and had heard this monkey story from his grandfather. One day, just like his grandfather, he passed by the same forest. It was very hot, and he took a nap under the same tree and left the hats on the floor.

He woke up and realized that all his hats were taken by the monkeys on the tree. He remembered his grandfather's words, started scratching his head and the monkeys followed. He took down his hat and fanned himself and again the monkeys followed. Now, very convinced of his grandfather's idea, Pappu threw his hat on the floor but to his surprise, the monkeys still held on to all the hats. Then one monkey climbed down the tree, grabbed the hat on the floor, gave him a slap and said








Guess What????????













"You think only you have a grandfather?"
-:))



B.E. vs MBA


An MBA and a BE go on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fell asleep. 


Some hours later, the BE wakes his MBA friend. " look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?"

The MBA ponders for a minute.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.

Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.

Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.

Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

What does it tell you?"

The BE is silent for a moment, then speaks.





"Practically...Someone has stolen our tent" !!!


We Engineers !!!


There was a good old barber in Bangalore . One day a
florist goes to him for a haircut. After the cut, he goes to pay the barber
and the barber replies:

I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am
doing
a Community Service.
Florist is happy and leaves the shop.



The next morning when the Barber goes to open his
shop, there is a "Thank You" Card and a dozen roses waiting at his door.



A Confectioner goes for a haircut and he also goes to
pay the barber he again refuses to take the money. The Confectioner is
happy and leaves the shop.





The next morning when the Barber goes to open his
shop, there is another "Thank you" Card and a dozen Cakes waiting at his
door.





A Software Engineer goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber
again refuses the money saying that it was a community
service.


The next morning when the Barber goes to open his
shop, guess what he finds there......





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(Believe me it's worth it!!!!!!!!!!)


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A Dozen Software engineers waiting for a free
haircut... with Printouts of
forwarded mail mentioning about free haircut !!!



GUJRATI FUNERAL


A family in Gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother (Ba)

arrived from the US. It was sent by one of the daughters.

The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in
it when they opened the lid; they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters:


Dear Chandrakant bhai, Arvind bhai, Smita ben and Varsha ,


I am sending Ba's body to you, since it was her wish that she should be cremated
in the compound of our
ancestral home in GUJARAT.

Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leave is consumed.

You will find inside the coffin, under Ba's body, cans of cheese, 10 packets of Tobler chocolates and 8 packets of Badam (peanuts) please divide these among all of you.

On Ba's feet you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan. There
are also 2 pairs of shoes for Radha's and Lakshmi's sons. Hope the sizes are correct.

Ba is wearing 6 American T-Shirts. The large size is for Mohan.

Just distribute the rest among yourselves.

The 2 new Jeans that Ba is wearing are for the boys.

The Swiss watch that Reema wanted is on Ba's left wrist. Shanta masi, Ba is
wearing the necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take them off her.

The 6 white cotton socks that Ba is wearing must be divided among my nephews.

Please distribute all these fairly.

Love Sumita ben.



QUITTING JOB


Dear Friends,


After a lot of thought, I have decided to leave my current JOB,

It is a very tough decision to make but , i am sorry I have decided.

Where i am going next, I have decided to join the Army " Israel Army"

Why ???

Thats where my Future is

You decide for yourself ....

scroll down for justification
















































































What do you think ? ;)

Munna Bhai - Software Engineer


appun jaise tappori s/w Engg. ko kya maalum...
saala programming kis chidiya kaa naam hai...

copy paste kaa kaam miltaa hai bass appun khush...!!!

fir yeh coding kaa lafdaa locha kaiko?

are kaiko ?

arre kaiko re?

fir ek din boleto appun ko project mila.....

ya haaaaaaaaaa!!!!

saala appun ka khopdi chakkar kha gaya .....

computer ke saath dil saala takkar kha gayaa...!!!

din bhar appun computer ke aagge...

koi lafdaa nahi kuch nahi...


Boss bola kya be munna saala tu bhi programmer bann gaya...!!!

ye munnabhai kya coding bana rela hai baap...!!!

(fir ...? fir kya huwa..?)

fir ek din appun ne coding poora kar diya...

form poora karke appun ne testing ko bhej diya...!!!

lagataa tha ab appun kaa kaam khatam ho gaya .....!!!

par module me issues dekhake sala appun darr gaya ....!!!

appun ke saamne tester ne mere coding me ki galtiyaa nikali... aapun ke coding ki poori waat laga di.... appun udharich khadaa thaa... par

appun kuch nahi bola... kaiko bolega? kaiko...?

saala ek, ek kaam kiya thaa... usme bhi itne bugs...

par appun ek aansu nahi roya...

kaiko royega...?

kaiko..?

saala appunich yedaa thaa naa...!!!

agale din se phir wohi life chalu...

wohi copy pasting...mails forward karnaa, wohi messages, wohi template, wohi assignments... saala itnaa mails forward kiya...itnaa mails forward kiya... log samze mail server down hoyega... bhoolneka hai bhoolneka hai par kya karega...!!!

training milke bhi jab kaam nahi miltaa hai...

haa thoda bore huwa par chaltaa hai...

(phir ...? phir kya huwa..?)

fir ...?

fir kya...?

fir agale din appun ko aur ek project mila...!!!

shaappak...

saala appun ka khopdi phir chakkar kha gaya ......

computer ke saath dil saala phir takkar kha gayaa...!!!



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